Sirius' Dia- Journal
by PotterIsMyPatronus
Summary: What is James and Lily's relationship to Sirius? Chaos, that's what.


**Has anyone told the story of Jily from Sirius' point of view? I think not. Settle down, children. Story time.**

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*** First Year ***

* * *

James Potter. That is God's name. Siriusly, where has he been all my life? He is actually perfect. We have exactly the same sense of humour, he doesn't criticize me when I procrastinate and he is the best person to eat bowl after bowl of egg fried rice with. I would marry him, Siriusly (I had to.)

Except no, because that's gay, and I'm not gay. Hahahaha.

I'm also friends with this adorable boy called Remus Lupin. He's rather endearing (but not in the gay way. Hahahaha) but he has to leave every month to visit his mother, and comes back with cuts. I hope his family isn't abusive. He's really smart too, and if I compliment him then he lets me copy his homework, so that's all good.

A short, chubby boy names Peter hands out with us too. He has his moments, but he isn't really as suited to the stardom that comes with being a Marauder – that's what we call ourselves, James, Remus, Peter and I – as the rest of us. He's a little creepy. I think he has a crush on James, it's a little scary.

On the topic of students in my year, I have to tell you about a certain redhead that is RUINING MY LIFE RIGHT NOW.

Her name?

Lily Genevieve Evans.

She sits next to James and I in Defence Against the Dark Arts, and she is the most annoying giril I have ever had the misfortune to meet. Her hair is really thick and goes to just past her shoulders, and it's actually blood red. Her eyes are super-duper green, not any of that lime stuff; I'm talking full on emerald green, and surrounded by freckles that ring around them—fairy dust, James calls them. She's a skinny, patronising, irritating, hot-headed, stupid, whiny, bitter, cruel freak, and my best friend likes her.

Fabulous.

He could have at least picked someone with a _body_.

* * *

*** Second Year ***

* * *

Hey, Sirius here. Here to rant about my frustration that Sadie Jugson won't go out with me, my Potions grade (LOL JKS I DON'T EVEN CARE) and the fact that my best friend is obsessed with a demented mouse.

She actually looks like a mouse. I'm Sirius (okay shut up with the name jokes, I'm Sirius now).

She always works with that greasy git of a boy, Snivellus, in Potions. Slughorn absolutely adores her, and so does Severus, and, obviously, James. Personally, I don't see the allure.

Of course, adorable little Remus is the good guy in this situation, saying that James can fancy whomever he pleases and that I should shut up and go do something meaningless. Honestly, Remy-kins, you think that I do meaningless things? _Everything_ I do has a meaning, even if I don't know it at the time.

Must be something to do with werewolves.

Oh, I didn't tell you? Remus is werewolf, and James, Peter and I help him out every full moon, when he goes to the Shrieking Shack to transform and stuff. He didn't like the idea, but James didn't give in—he's so cool—and now we go with him and assist him in being discreet. As long as we have James's sacred Cloak of Invisibility, we'll be okay.

I have to go. I got detention for hexing Snivellus earlier with James and Peter.

…What? He deserved it!

* * *

*** Third Year ***

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_**Awh, as long as we have my—James's—Invisibility Cloak we'll all be okay, by the way I adore James Potter and kiss his arse every day because he's that fucking attractive. He honestly can't help being this se**_

James, get out. Don't you have to go and be rejected by the apple of your eye or something?

Honestly. No privacy around here.

It's a journal. Just putting that out there.

Guess what? I'm 5'4 now! Time for applause. I've never been more grateful for puberty. Holly Simpkins is finally responding to my innuendos.

James is a bit of a… late bloomer. His voice is cracking like it's spitting in half, but he's not growing. Go home, puberty, you're drunk.

It's not doing much for his chances with Evans, unless the husky, half-falsetto-half-baritone, just-got-out-of-bed-with-a-splitting-hangover voice is appealing to the opposite sex.

I don't think much is appealing to Evans right now. She's crying in the best armchair. I expect she and Snivellus fell out again. Merlin, girl, pull yourself together. Or get out of the armchair so I can sit on it. Choose.

It was James's idea to hex him. We didn't mean for him to get that angry. It's not like we _made_ him yell at Evans like that. However, afterwards, James _made _him bend like a pretzel, because he was so mad. It was actually scary.

Got to go, Remus is doing him homework, so he's vulnerable.

* * *

*** Fourth Year ***

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_QuidditchLilyQuidditchLilyLi lyFoodLilyLilyQuidditchLilyS leepLilyHomeworkQuidditchLil yLily_

You have just listened to the jist of James's conversations for the last month.

There's something wrong with him. Sometimes I question that he's actually human. He hasn't mentioned having sex _once _yet. Oh, well, he'll get there eventually.

Peter got his first kiss yesterday, with Holly Simpkins (we broke up because apparently I was 'looking at other girls'. Psh. As if. Oh, look, there's Martha now.) You know things are bad when Peter of all people gets his first kiss before you, I said to James. The punch was so worth it.

Despite his skinny little arms, my little Jamie-kins can really throw a punch. He's so cool, he's growing up so fast.

His voice is settling down now, but it still decides to drop to the centre of the earth whenever he sees Evans. That's probably just instinct, though.

Ooh, speaking of Evans, she got her first boyfriend the other day. Amos Diggory, the Hufflepuff pretty boy. James was on the verge of committing suicide by drowing himself in Moaning Myrtle's bathroom ("At least I'll have company as I die," he said) but I managed to save him and convince him that surely the best thing in the situation was destroying Diggory, not himself. He agreed whole-heartedly. Now he is in detention with Minnie.

Marlene McKinnon and Remus are dating. Match made in Hell. If they last the week, I'll personally give him an award. He's just not the type to be able to handle her domineering attitude. Being a werewolf is enough, so why add another load onto his shoulders?

I can hear them shouting now.

They broke up.

Wow, one day. I'm not surprised.

Ooh, Seventh year girls!

* * *

*** Fifth Year ***

* * *

Snivellus called Evans a Mudblood.

In front of almost the whole year.

I have never seen James so shocked. In all honesty, I Siriusly dislike the girl, but I wouldn't dream of calling her _that_. And he was her best friend.

Do I feel sorry for her? Is that what I'm feeling?

In any case, turning her back on him like that was really brave. Best to cut all ties. That boy is no good; he should stay with his own house, if he doesn't want his nose further disfigured by none other than James Potter.

James tried to say sorry to her for the ambush on Snivellus, he told me, but she wouldn't listen, and eventually she just called him a toerag, whacked him on the arm, burst into tears and ran away.

Let her keep running, dear fellow. She'll be the death of you, I said.

I don't care, he replied.

Also, we have successfully became Unregistered Animaguses, and with the help of our trusty Marauders' Map, a map of Hogwarts that shows what everyone is doing, every minute of every day, we can do no wrong.

Messrs. Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs, are proud to present the year of OWLs.

I don't care. I'll scrape a pass. I'm confident.

* * *

*** Sixth Year ***

* * *

I…

Uh…

It's been a bad year. For all of us.

In a nutshell, I left my parents and was disowned by my family for not supporting Voldemort, so I moved in with James. I tried to kill Snivellus by leading him to Moony when he was a werewolf, and James rescued him and now he hates me. Peter is getting more and more nervous every day because of the rise of the Dark Lord and stuff, and about what he's doing to the Muggle-borns and stuff. He's getting all twitchy and paranoid. I don't know how he'll hold out. He's not the bravest of Gryffindors.

James's family fell apart because his cousins became Purebloods and his parents got into a row with them and now the whole family thinks that he's a Blood Traitor. Evans rejected him one too many times, and he's falling apart.

I hate her. I hate her I hate her I hate her _I hate her I hate her I hate her_.

He's changing, James is. It's scaring me. I think he's breaking.

What's happening?

I'll kill her. I will kill her.

I don't care if James hates me, or is trying to change for her and become a _better person_, I'll kill her for what she did to my best friend.

* * *

*** Seventh Year ***

* * *

James is Head Boy. Don't ask me how, or why, because I don't know, but he got the badge, and Evans is Head Girl.

That's how it started.

It was very long and confusing, and it wasn't aided at all by my overwhelming hatred for her, but basically, they're dating now, in a serious relationship (not a Sirius relationship). They're talking about marriage.

I hope I'm the best man, that's all I'm saying. Hint hint.

_**Discreet, Padfoot, very discreet.**_

That's just how I roll.

Turns out, Evans isn't a total bitch; she's actually really witty, and is making James happy. That's what matters really, isn't it?

I need egg fried rice. I think too much.

Being perfect is a chore.

* * *

_**Fin.**_


End file.
